a huge decision...help!

[mustang_hope22]

okay, about a month and 1/2 ago, i bought a 2 1/2 year old Quarter Horse gelding for my 12 year old daughter who has about 6 years of horse experience but not with a young horse. He was wonderful but i sent him to a trainer's for about a month and he came home and was doing great with her. But the thing is, about a week ago, she was lunging him and he ran off twice in the same day. and then she was busy for about 3 days so she couldnt ride. she came back the next day and he bucked 3 times in the arena. yesterday she was walking him out to the arena, and he reared up, he hit her leg with his leg, she let go of the lead rope cause he took off.

I am just wondering if he is too strong for her. I hate it that we might have to give up, because she loves him and she had so many plans for them. and we spent around $2000 on him. I just dont know what to do. I'd love to hear your opinions, stories about this type of thing, or anything! thanks!

[horseloverinVA]

Originally Posted by mustang_hope22

okay, about a month and 1/2 ago, i bought a 2 1/2 year old Quarter Horse gelding for my 12 year old daughter who has about 6 years of horse experience but not with a young horse. He was wonderful but i sent him to a trainer's for about a month and he came home and was doing great with her. But the thing is, about a week ago, she was lunging him and he ran off twice in the same day. and then she was busy for about 3 days so she couldnt ride. she came back the next day and he bucked 3 times in the arena. yesterday she was walking him out to the arena, and he reared up, he hit her leg with his leg, she let go of the lead rope cause he took off.

I am just wondering if he is too strong for her. I hate it that we might have to give up, because she loves him and she had so many plans for them. and we spent around $2000 on him. I just dont know what to do. I'd love to hear your opinions, stories about this type of thing, or anything! thanks!

If she's willing, stick with him for a while. Even though he was trained he needs time and consistency. He's still just a goofy youngster.

[SoCo]

I suggest you find a trainer that will come to you at least 2x a week and work with the horse and with your daughter. This way the trainer will stop the bad/young behavior and show your daughter what to do and during the week your daugther can take what she learns from those lessons and enforce them on her own.

[horsebabyhehe]

i agree he sounds like a typical youngster testing the waters to see what he can get away with. tell your daughter to keep her chin up and keep trying and i too think a trainer once or twice a week would benefit them both. good luck!!

[EquineAlberta]

He is two years old. he has the brain of a two year old. They are not going to be as level headed, as predictable or as consistent as a mature horse. He is growing physically as well as mentally, so tack that fit one week may not fit the next, dental issues may cause annoyance and a lack of focus, joints may hurt. Lunging strains his joints, riding strains his underdeveloped spine.

At that age their brain isn't fully developed and some 2-3 year olds can have moments when they react rather than think (just like a teenager). The trainer could likely forsee when the horse's mind was wandering, or when he had enough and act appropriately, but your daughter may not have enough experience to know this.

Not all 2-3 year olds are this way, but some are, and they require either consistency, or time to grow up. Really he is too young to be lunged or ridden much, so perhaps you could just give him some time to mature, send him to the trainer in the spring, and see how he does as a 3 year old.

$2000.00 isn;t very much when you are talking about an investment in your child.

Karen

[cameo05]

Please do not take this the wrong way, but 30 days training on a 2 1/2 year old is not enough. It especially not enough for a 12yo to handle, even though she has riding experience. This sounds like a respect issue and not enough time put into him. Is there anyway that you can get that trainer to give your daughter lessons on how to properly lunge him and handle him the way that he the trainer did. Him eing 2 1/2 he will have his days as he is not mentally mature enough to handle inconsistancy. Bucking under saddle is a different issue and can e corrected with the right handling and time. Rememer this is a very very young horse. I honestly would rather see a more experienced person handling him til he was a little older. I am sorry that this is happening to you and your daughter. I wished I could give you more insight, but I just don't think that young and young go together and it has nothing to do with your daughters riding ability.

[vetjeanne]

Cameo is right 30 days is kindergarden, turn the horse out for 3 weeks then take him back to the trainer. I turn them out for a while to let the sore joints and bones recover. A horse should remenber training if the trainer say to keep riding or he freshen up then change trainers. I will lay off my colts when they ,return for 30 to 60 days, then ride a few weeks then take them back for first grade if needed.

[Carri]

I agree. At 2 1/2, he is too young to expect him to act the same all the time. I actually debated whether or not 7 is too young for my daughter's pony, she has "young" moments sometimes. She just hasn't seen enough of the world yet.

[horselady]

In my opinion the 2 1/2 year old horse is taking advantage of a 12 year old girl who has been riding but is not strong enough or not prepared enough to handle what he is dishing out.
perhaps an adult could take over and work with your daughter.
Riding is a lot different that traing a horse with only 30 days., Even myself working with youngsters I always work with someone else.
Do not give up, he will learn right now he is in kindergarten.and just needs time.

[A J]

Okay, I realize this may not be overly popular, but having your 12 year old daughter work with a green horse, especially one that young, is asking for trouble.

There are several reasons I say this: First, IMO, the horse is too young to be working like an older horse. He is not mentally or physically ready for that. Also, he is going to test, he is going to push his limits, and he is going to have bad days, weeks, even months depending on the horse. He may need a few months off to mature, or even a year.

Secondly, your daughter, no matter how experienced, is going to lack in sheer strength and coordination. She is not going to react quickly enough or be able to read his body language enough to predict and subsequently prevent, any bad behavior. When he does act up, she is not going to have the strength or size to correct him, even if she knows how to handle it properly.

IF this is going to work, I REALLY feel your daughter needs to be working with a trainer throughout the entire process. She needs someone experienced with young horses out there EVERY time she is working him so when he starts to act up, an adult can step in and correct him before it becomes a habit. She will need lessons on how to train a youngster - 30 days barely gets the basic basics on a horse, and even as an excellent rider, at 12 your daughter is still going to need a lot of guidence to prevent problems further down the line.

IMO, which is just my opinion I wouldn't have a 12 year old working a 2 1/2 year old unless a trainer was right there every single time they worked together - seems like it is way to easy for your daughter to get hurt or scared, either of which could ruin her love for horses, and I'd hate to see that happen! Not that she can't work with him, but needs an experienced-with-young-horses person right there with her to keep things from getting dangerous or from creating bad habits for either horse or rider.

[thumpersgirl]

I agree that if your daughter is going to work with this horse, it would be best to have her doing such with a trainer. At 2-1/2 the horse is just to immature for a 12 year old to handle.

[GreyDot]

I'm sorry, but I have to also say that this horse seems to be too young for a 12 year old child. There are certainly young girls out there who are capable of handling problem horses, just as there are 2 1/2 year old horses who have the emotional and psychological maturity to be a trustworthy mount for a child - but these are both freak rarities. I'm sure you meant well, by buying him for her, and obviously did a smart thing by sending the horse to a trainer, but even without knowing either the horse or your daughter, it seems like an inherently dangerous situation. The clever trainer never assembles a young child with a young horse. The combined age must be at least 18.

As much as your daughter may love this horse, for your own peace of mind as well as for her safety it migh be better to simply trade him for an older, safer horse whom she will be able to handle. I'm not saying she needs a bomb-proof packer, as she is obviously looking for at least some challenge, having several years' experience under her belt - but I would definitely at least look at a horse who is already fully trained. He doesn't have to be dead quiet, so maybe you'll be able to get a horse that may have a quick trot or some other 'more simple' training issue that your daughter can work out on her own or with the help of a trainer, but he DOES need to be already trained, so that she does not get hurt. Just my two cents' worth.

[pippy]

I also agree that the age of the horse is to young for the daughter. Heck, even a three year old green broke would most likely be to much. I realize you say your daughter has 6 years riding experience,and I don't discount that as important but that is not the same as 6 years of horse behavior/ training experience. In other words, you can ride for 6 years and still not be experienced enough to take on the needs of training a young horse. Also, if your daughter is 12, then that means at age 6 she started riding, but at age 6, she is not learning to train..more then likely she learned the basics..and general riding..as she got older she became better at it, but being so young, you just don't learn as much as say an older child (teen) because you are limited in size alone, by what you can do, or if you were an adult, so the 6 years starting at age 6, in my opinion would not qualify her for such an endeavor.
But you are into it now, so what I'd do, is what others have said, go back to the trainer and do it quick before the horse learns to get away w/ anymore then it has...or sell the horse. I would not let the child, no matter how bright or talented, train said horse w/ out a mentor/ trainer at her side.
I hope she wears a helmet- many folks over look them...when working our young horses, in the saddle or on the ground, we have helmets on, incase one rears and knocks the noggin...maybe it wouldn't help, but it sure doesn't hurt any.

[BabyMay]

I agree with everyone else. The horse is too young for your daughter. Besides having the attention span of a fly at that age, they have way too much energy. My daughters yearling even though she is turned out during the day, will just explode and run and buck like crazy when my daughter turns her loose in the outdoor. After she has been a nut for about 10 minutes , she gets her lessons. By than , she is a little more tired and able to pay attention for awhile. They need lots of turn out and ways to use up some of that energy when they are young horses. A 12 yr old is just not strong enough to make them behave. By the way, my daughter is 30. And I still get nervous when she handles the young ones.

[mustang_hope22]

i understand about the "too green for you daughter" or "too strong for a 12 year old" comments, but he has had more training than 30 days, he has probably 100-120 days of training. would you recommend any things to build their relationship and should she ride as often??

[RockwoodDawn]

I think it depends on your daughter and her relationship with the horse. I am older and started riding when I was 10. Don't tell you daught this, but I started riding by sneeking out to pastures with my trusty rope and rode stange horses with a halter and lead rope. I became friends with a couple of girls that had horses when I was 12 and rode with them on thier horses. None of thier horses, or any horses that I knew then were what is now called kid broke. We lived though it, with many bruises and 2 of the 3 of us still have horses, over 45 years later. I have trained horses, had a boarding barn, and taught beginners. If she wants to train her horse, she can do it. She should surf the web to see the different methods of training, read books, rent dvds and have lessons with a GOOD trainer if you can afford it. You should have a talk with her, and explain to her that if she wants to keep this horse then she should expect to have to work hard, and not expect to show for at least two years. (It may not be this long, but better to overestamate than under.) Also let her know that the horse being so young that she will have to have a lot of patience with her. If she is not willing to put the patience and work in him, it is time to sell him and get a older trained horse, that she can have fun on. It should if you can afford it be entirely up to her. This can be a very good matureing lesson for you and your daughter on faceing a "grown up" decision.

[vetjeanne]

It does'nt matter how many days of training the horse has had if it bucks her off and your daughter breaks a bone or worse then the relationship is damaged. The gelding was perfect till a month after the trainer,now his attitude is getting worse the relationship is already falling apart.

[A J]

Originally Posted by mustang_hope22

i understand about the "too green for you daughter" or "too strong for a 12 year old" comments, but he has had more training than 30 days, he has probably 100-120 days of training. would you recommend any things to build their relationship and should she ride as often??

Working with a trainer each time she works with him. Obviously he is too young, and she is not strong enough/experienced enough/etc, doesn't matter if he's been ridden steadily since he was 2, he's still young and green, and is going to operate like he's young and green.

There's no magical way to make him listen to her other than him being taught what proper behavior is. Due to the fact that they are at this point already, it is obvious she lacks the skills to train him properly on her own.

Doesn't mean she can't train him, but for everyone to stay safe, and to ensure a healthy, long relationship, IMO she needs a trainer to work with her. I've seen 12 year olds work with young horses - BUT, there was someone there making sure things were done safely and the horse was trained correctly.

[GreyDot]

I understand that your daughter REALLY wants this horse. However, it's not about having a couple months' training on him. This horse is too YOUNG, not just too green! Psychologically, there is too much for a girl that age to be dealing with. Of course, it's your child - and your risk - but having ridden for 38 years, and having trained horses (and kids) for more than 20, I can tell you that it's not a risk I would ever take. You are dealing with 1100 lbs of unpredictability - which has now developed 'habits'. Surely, you don't think that 100-120 days is going to reverse that and suddenly produce a child-safe horse?

[ToveroMom]

You know you got some really well thought out info here.
I hope you ponder long on it.
I could not have said it half so well.