Fear that comes with old age

[Kendra]

Okay I'm admitting it ~ now that I've gotten older I have developed this little itty bitty fear of getting dumped.

Here is my dilema:

I am training one of the 'wild 'palominos that we bought at the horse sale a couple months ago for my daughter. (We sold two of them) I have taken my time, done lots of ground work and he is now easy to catch, cross ties, can be touched all over, gives his feet, accepts fly spray etc, leads, longes, takes the saddle, walks over obstacles ( bridge, poles etc) and generally will follow me anywhere ( even weave through poles following me)

I have worked up from him exploding when you even touch his back to standing on a step stool leaning all the way over him, touching and patting his sides and butt at the same time and having him walk off a few steps (talented aren't I) I can slap the stirrups against him and shake the saddle by the horn. He accepts it all and roots for treats because he knows what a good boy he is.

My problem is I can step in the stirrup and get up and down on both sides and he doesn't mind but I am a little leary to take that step to swing my leg over as I know if he dumps me I'm gonna be laid up for a while 'cause I'm just not as young as I once was. At the stage he is at mentally I know he is ready for the next step and with any other horse I would just do it knowing I have laid the correct foundation but not this one.

I broke my paint colt this winter with no problem but this boy is a true challenge. I think the problem is mind over matter as the other two palomino geldings ( Socks and Twist) are now up for sale again as the guy we sold them to gave up. He said Socks is rideable but unpredictable and Twist is just mentally fried. ( If I get this issue (mine not his) with Frost dealt with we may take the other two back and try to rehab them)

We do not know the history behind these boys as the rumours are many.

* Never been handled
* Went through 2,3,4, 5 trainers ( # depends on who you talk to) and are unbreakable
* Bad trainer messed them up

The rumours go on. I am treating him as distrustful of humans for whatever reason and have worked hard to gain his trust and his respect (I don't take no crap but I'm fair.)

Regardless we are taking our time to sort through whatever issues Frost has but my age may be slowing down the process.
I have considered getting someone younger and better looking than me to take the first 'ride' but he just doesn't trust anyone else near him. My husband has tried to lean over him and so has my daughter and he tries to buck. I can haul the metal step stool over clanging and banging and hitting his belly with it and haul my middle aged butt up there and flop over him without any grace and slap him in the belly a few times on the other side and he will stand on a loose lead and eat grass but as soon as they reach for his back he is gone. I have had them spend time with him and bribe him with treats but he isn't falling for it. I even once fell off the stool and ended up under his belly with my feet tangled in the stool thinking "I'm gonna get kicked in the head now" and he just looked at me like "what are you doing now ma?"

How do I get passed the mental block I have made for myself and just swing my leg over. Or do I have to conceed I'm a chicken and am getting too old for the rough ones??

Here's Sun Frost Dude in case you forgot his handsome mug

[JoAnne]

I don't blame you...I'm getting "mature" myself!! Question...can you lessen the risk by when you first swing leg over, having your husband hold him with a lead rope over halter and bridle so that if he moves off there is someone else controling him? also wear a helmet, and if you can hold of one, an eventing vest ( or a padded ski jacket lol)

anyway, those are my ideas. you also might wait a while till the horse is even more ground broke and trained/used to being handled on the ground.

[gbarmranch]

As someone who has been dumped numerous times, is now approaching 52 and was recently diagnosed with brittle bones , I completely understand.. and yup, I too am still crazy enough (although I prefer the term "passionate" ) to climb on two year olds and various goofy horses..

What I have done that helps me mentally is to have someone use a lunge line for those first rides on any horse I think might try to buck me off. Yes, you can still sail gracefully through the air; and yes, you could still "thump" instead of "bounce" - but it should minimize the danger... Plus, that trust factor will go a long ways to keeping him quiet..

Just a thought!

Lovely horses by the way!

[gypsy]

I completely understand. We actually paid someone to start a few of ours this spring. Just about 15 rides to get past that initial mounting and so forth. I have a daughter of PC Bronsin that is 6 and was just started this year. She has never offered to buck but she is very "watchy" and sensitive.
I have heard that you do not pick a fight with a Sunfrost horse.
You will get there just be patient.

[Kendra]

Well as soon as I sent the post I felt dumber than a bag of nails but at least now I'm chuckling about it.

I had no fear of breaking my paint colt this past spring and he bucked for about a month ( dang Impressive horses ~ lol) I'm the one that climbs on everyone's horse when it is giving them a problem. My daughter still says
" Mom Dollar's being a handful will you ride him today".

And I have also heard all the Sun Frost stories

BTW we always have someone hold a horse for the first few mountings and I will be wearing full body armour

I did contact the breeder and was told they never had a problem breaking them.

Frost really is a sweetheart and has never given me reason not to trust him although he has been leary of anyone else trying to get on him. I would send him to a trainer but around here I AM the trainer

I just have suddenly developed this dang fear of getting hurt.

I mean here I am at 46, with kids and a fulltime job and a mortgage and I'm afraid of getting dumped and breaking a limb What's up with that????

OMG ~ does that mean I'm OLD????

[b-mark]

Oh my, I must have missed his picture before ..... He's GORGEOUS!

And, I SO know about the 'fear issues with age' thing.... do I ever. I will have to say this.... I got passed it once with Mark.... by 'desensitizing' him - which (and I believe this was a very sneaky thing for my trainer to do) did the same to me.

By the time I actually swung up there - I wasn't even thinking about anything going wrong. Take this with all the salt in the world ('cuz I'm totally in limbo right now) - wait until he gives you a 'sign' that he's ready. I'm not sure how else to explain it - for me it came unexpected, totally not planned for that day - but it was unmistakable.

Hope this helps!

[gbarmranch]

Yup, but not mentally.. so go for it! That is what will keep you young..

My grandmother was always reminding me that life is not a dress rehersal - go for the gusto, and live every day to the fullest. I figure I have just as good a chance of getting hurt driving on the freeways (probably more so around here ) as I do riding one of our youngsters.. and you have the experience to know when he is ready for you to put that leg over .. so go for it..

Just have someone there with a camera so we can enjoy the triumph with you!

[Kendra]

Originally Posted by JoAnne

also wear a helmet, and if you can hold of one, an eventing vest ( or a padded ski jacket lol)

Ski jacket???? ~ do you know how hot is in Ontario today????? LOL

My issue is just with this particular horse????? All the stories I have heard have me convinced I'm gonna break more than the horse.

He actually really likes me and we have a great rapport. He does everything I ask and I laugh alot when I work with him because he's such a goof.

I was having him follow me over obstacles last week and he stopped to pick up a pylon and when I looked behind me there he was following me around swinging this darn orange pylon in his mouth.

[sundancer maiden]

We should have our own club ladies. Been there, done that. Matter of fact the last time I got dumped, I remember just laying there for a moment (as I tried moving my legs) thinking "I'm too old for this *###* stuff". I'm going for even paying someone else to do those first rides.
I'm getting a 3 year old that has been saddled and led around with a teenager sitting on his back. He's been handled and messed with all his life, the current owner owns his dam. She's a good person, even asked me, just to be sure that I realize he's not "broke". I said "trust me, you've done the hard part"!!! I can handle everything else just fine.
You can be thrown from fully broke horses sure, but it's not as likely.
If you are feeling nervous, you can bet that he feels it. You are the only one who can make a final decision, but you need to feel comfortable.
Man, wouldn't it be nice to be a teenager again, and when you fall the only thing bruised is your pride!!! (I wouldn't want most of the other things that come with being that young though!!!)
Good luck. Please keep us updated on your progress, he is one beautiful animal!!!!!!!!!

[championhorse]

I think we ALL have a fear of climbing on a horse for the first time, because we never know what to expect. It doesn't mean your old...

I work problem horses for people, and I have the same fear everytime. It's normal. It's a good sign it means you're on your toes. I have been amazed, normally it seems like the ones I have the fear about, ride off like they have done it all the time.

I just make sure to have them used to a bridle, and get them used to moving off preasure like the john lyons method. (from the ground)Then you know they will respond if you have to pull their head up.

and don't forget your armour...

He is GORGEOUS.

and don't forget the pics.

[dimpleflirt]

Hey I feel for ya ! I'm the same way even with my dead broke horses.I just turned 36 but I'm really overweight which makes mounting um.... fun.Not. I don't fear my horses but myself. Over the past two years I've twisted my ankle twice and popped my knee once when the saddle slipped.When on krutches and being a single parent (for me ) you start thinking about who will clean the house,feed the critters,drive the kids to school,cook dinner and so on .....I couldn't imagine getting on an un broke one that job is for my teenager she bounces better.

[Bonanza]

At forty-four with both kids and grandkids I ain't that far behind you - I know exactly how you feel. I was wondering what brand of insanity caused me to be the first to throw my leg over my then two year old Bo's back last year at my age - especially since I had never done a "first ride" before. But I gotta tell ya - I am so glad it was me and not someone else. Of course Bo's sleepy cooperation and only a small crowhop in protest when asked to move forward helped alot! Anyway - it sounds like you are being very thorough in your groundwork and your boy trusts you. Your worry is a normal product of this doggone maturity thing - you know you aren't immortal like you thought when you were younger and others are depending on you.

And GBarM is absolutely right - I would much rather ride a youngster than get on 635 or 35 in my car in Dallas

[Kendra]

I'm feeling much better now that I've heard others feel this way too.

I guess I've just never felt like this before and thought OMG this is stupid I do this all the time.

[KatieMae]

Hire a crash test dummy??

Sorry, I'm cracking jokes at myself...

[JoAnne]

the ski jacket was kind of a joke!! I agree with above poster and mentioned it too. I don't think you or horse is ready. I think you are pushing it along for no particular reason.

Ground work with him more, have others work with him more so he does not become a one person horse. wait until he almost seems bored having people around and messing with him. right now he still sounds too spooky and reactive. when he starts acting bored and softening up in his attitude, imo that is the time to ride him.

[gbarmranch]

It hit me last spring, right after the doctor told me I was .02% away from full blown ostioarthritis (spelling ?) - the day before I was fearless... suddenly, I realized I could potentially be crippled for life..

It lasted about 8 months... and then I said to heck with it.. better to have what time I do have doing what I love, then to sit and wait for --- what - the years aren't going to melt away - although I have asked Santa for some new bones.. :

Since I have always ridden, always started horses, and feel comfortable that I do the proper ground and prep work first, I will just continue to do what I have always done..

You will work through this and the horses issues too - and feel such a great sense of relief after that first ride..

[gbarmranch]

Originally Posted by KatieMae

Hire a crash test dummy??

Sorry, I'm cracking jokes at myself...

That is you, you young whippersnapper..

[Diamond_Y]

Originally Posted by Bonanza

I would much rather ride a youngster than get on 635 or 35 in my car in Dallas

That's the honest truth!!

[SunnyKS]

Oh I have been in your position....literally! Standing there with a leg poised to go over a well started, been standing there so long waiting on me she's half asleep, bored out her mind, green filly; life flashing before my eyes, heart pounding, telling myself how incredibity stupid it is to be afraid and yet still very much frozen in place.

Even came here and posted about it too.

We're all rooting for you!

[roberts617]

I have no better advice than what has already been said, but he is a VERY handsome boy!