Shy filly

cole · 01-22-2006, 10:36 PM

As some of you know I bought a daft cross from an auction she was in a kill pen. Before the sale she was just took off her mom. Her first time with people was being hit with poles and made to run around scared. Once I bought her she was penned up agains a gate and thrown on the ground to get a halter on (I didn't do that an amish guy did). After that she tried everything to get away from me. That didn't happen. I have had her since Nov. She is an awesome little filly that has been though a lot. The problem I have is that she only really likes me and thats it. She HATES guys. She also doesn't relaly like to be messed with. She gets scared. I mess with her for about an hour every day. She also spooks at a lot of stuff. What can I do to get her over this? I have been around horses my whole life. I mean she isn't mean she just doesn't want to be messed with at all. She wants attention but its like shes scared at the same time. She is even worse when my boyfriend is around. He has never tried to hurt her at all. Someone please help. I love this little girl. I dont want her to be scared forever.

QuartersAllTheWay · 01-22-2006, 10:42 PM

Sack her out, everyday for that hour you spend with her. Get her used to tarps and ponchos. whatever seems scary. It will help her to learn not to be and how to handle her fear. It will help her to build confidence. I know she is young, but you can start doing this from a very young age. Good luck with her.

snickers · 01-22-2006, 10:45 PM

Quarters has excellant advice.
Start off with small things and work up to bigger things.
Its understandable about bonding with woman than men.
Men have hurt her and scared her and she has lost trust
there.
Take your time and work slow, she will come around.

joustinggirl · 01-23-2006, 05:08 AM

I like to start with feed bags to sack them out. The paper ones crinkle, but they are intriged with the smell. I may even use some of the feed for them to find in the bag. You can even lay them down in the round pen for her to walk around or on. there was a huge thread some time back about desensitizing.

gingerfleguel · 01-23-2006, 07:31 AM

What's a "Daft Mix" hehehe

UnderSun&Moon · 01-23-2006, 08:00 AM

desensitising is exactly what she needs. Its not going to be so easy with her since she's had a truly traumatising experience but it can be done. she's young so you have alot of time to work on this.

the key here is to keep "working" the object you are using to sack her out with until she seems bored with it. OR the best response is that she does not move her feet. Remember they can move a lot at first but they cannot go far away... using her halter and a long lead helps with this. let her leave and deal with her emotions for a few minutes but go right back. she can leave but not go far. Standing still in the face of a scary object will get her to thinking. wow its not really trying to kill me.. lol

what i do with my mustang is do the "touch it" game. I present to him a new thing to get used to and ask him to touch it with his nose. so he can see that it wont eat him. then i touch him with said object all over. but i don't stop working that item until he stands perfectly still like he just don't care and is licking and chewing. the licking and chewing lets me know he is relaxed. the main key is not to stop until young the desired response regardless how long that it takes.

good luck! draft crosses are my favorite!! one thing about draft horses i have learned as once they learn something well they never seem to forget it. in the case of your baby she learned that some men are not always so gentle. so it may take a little longer to get through to her but with love an patience it can be done.

sheila

EquineAlberta · 01-23-2006, 12:35 PM

When we had some wildish draft crosses, we used food to get them used to people and to be trusting. Let your boyfriend feed her too. If you board her, have it so you feed her at least one feeding, and put her feed on or near spooky stuff.

Consider too what she is being fed....too much (or any) grain may make her more difficult. She should likely only need hay.

If she starts to look for you and for training time as feeding time too, it may make her a more willing partner.

You may also want to be more aware of your body language around her...little things like standing with your hip thrust toward her may make her think you are "pushing" her away, and could confuse her.

Good luck, I am sure the bond will happen and she will relax!

Gottahavehorses · 01-23-2006, 01:11 PM

First of all...give her lots of TLC & be patient with her.
When you initially go in the barn, do you go in guns blazing, or do you walk in like you're sneakin' into church?
Don't run into her stall, but try matter-of-factly going in with her. Talk to her in a calm voice. Start from her head & work your way down, petting her slowly & softly. It may take you days or even weeks to touch her all over, but she isn't going anywhere. If you find a spot that she likes you to touch, touch it alot! All the while, let your boyfriend help so she will understand not all men are going to hurt her. Then, once you can comfortably handle her all over & for longer periods, start introducing her to the scaries.
Take it one day at a time and I promise, you'll get there with her. Good luck!

Nogami47 · 01-23-2006, 09:10 PM

Everybody has really good advice. Just remember that she's still very young and it would be natural for her to be a little spooky at this stage even without her trauma. Just give her lots of time and only work on one small step at a time, like you would do with a wild mustang. Spend as much time with her as you can, even if it's just sitting near her reading a book. Lots of quiet, calm time. If you know how to do T-Touch, you could try that.

cole · 01-23-2006, 09:41 PM

The only reason I am worried is that I bought a horse about a year ago. She was a yearling and had never been touched ever before. After I got her home she was easy to get to trust and aslo she wasn't scared of anything and is going to be a great horse. My mom made me sell her though

. So I was just wondering if it was from the auction that my draft cross was like that or what.

Nogami47 · 01-23-2006, 09:56 PM

Well, I expect it is. It certainly sounds like she had a bad time. But I think you can be optimistic since she's so young. With good treatment and lots of patience, I would think there's a real good chance she'll get over it eventually.

01-22-2006, 10:36 PM
cole Halter broke Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: illinois Posts: 91	Shy filly As some of you know I bought a daft cross from an auction she was in a kill pen. Before the sale she was just took off her mom. Her first time with people was being hit with poles and made to run around scared. Once I bought her she was penned up agains a gate and thrown on the ground to get a halter on (I didn't do that an amish guy did). After that she tried everything to get away from me. That didn't happen. I have had her since Nov. She is an awesome little filly that has been though a lot. The problem I have is that she only really likes me and thats it. She HATES guys. She also doesn't relaly like to be messed with. She gets scared. I mess with her for about an hour every day. She also spooks at a lot of stuff. What can I do to get her over this? I have been around horses my whole life. I mean she isn't mean she just doesn't want to be messed with at all. She wants attention but its like shes scared at the same time. She is even worse when my boyfriend is around. He has never tried to hurt her at all. Someone please help. I love this little girl. I dont want her to be scared forever.

01-22-2006, 10:42 PM
QuartersAllTheWay Yearling Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 854	Sack her out, everyday for that hour you spend with her. Get her used to tarps and ponchos. whatever seems scary. It will help her to learn not to be and how to handle her fear. It will help her to build confidence. I know she is young, but you can start doing this from a very young age. Good luck with her.

01-22-2006, 10:45 PM
snickers Bombproof Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Twilight Zone Posts: 8,989	Quarters has excellant advice. Start off with small things and work up to bigger things. Its understandable about bonding with woman than men. Men have hurt her and scared her and she has lost trust there. Take your time and work slow, she will come around. __________________ " You cant fix stupid " Ron White Life is to short to argue with ignorant people.

01-23-2006, 05:08 AM
joustinggirl Greenbroke Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Boones Mill, Virgina Posts: 3,392	I like to start with feed bags to sack them out. The paper ones crinkle, but they are intriged with the smell. I may even use some of the feed for them to find in the bag. You can even lay them down in the round pen for her to walk around or on. there was a huge thread some time back about desensitizing. __________________ Pink Tiger says \'Grrrrrr\'

01-23-2006, 07:31 AM
gingerfleguel Kid Safe Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Ottawa Posts: 5,494	What's a "Daft Mix" hehehe

01-23-2006, 08:00 AM
UnderSun&Moon Weanling Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Springfield TN Posts: 332	desensitising is exactly what she needs. Its not going to be so easy with her since she's had a truly traumatising experience but it can be done. she's young so you have alot of time to work on this. the key here is to keep "working" the object you are using to sack her out with until she seems bored with it. OR the best response is that she does not move her feet. Remember they can move a lot at first but they cannot go far away... using her halter and a long lead helps with this. let her leave and deal with her emotions for a few minutes but go right back. she can leave but not go far. Standing still in the face of a scary object will get her to thinking. wow its not really trying to kill me.. lol what i do with my mustang is do the "touch it" game. I present to him a new thing to get used to and ask him to touch it with his nose. so he can see that it wont eat him. then i touch him with said object all over. but i don't stop working that item until he stands perfectly still like he just don't care and is licking and chewing. the licking and chewing lets me know he is relaxed. the main key is not to stop until young the desired response regardless how long that it takes. good luck! draft crosses are my favorite!! one thing about draft horses i have learned as once they learn something well they never seem to forget it. in the case of your baby she learned that some men are not always so gentle. so it may take a little longer to get through to her but with love an patience it can be done. sheila __________________ Be good to one another

01-23-2006, 12:35 PM
EquineAlberta Seasoned Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Alberta, Canada Posts: 4,695	When we had some wildish draft crosses, we used food to get them used to people and to be trusting. Let your boyfriend feed her too. If you board her, have it so you feed her at least one feeding, and put her feed on or near spooky stuff. Consider too what she is being fed....too much (or any) grain may make her more difficult. She should likely only need hay. If she starts to look for you and for training time as feeding time too, it may make her a more willing partner. You may also want to be more aware of your body language around her...little things like standing with your hip thrust toward her may make her think you are "pushing" her away, and could confuse her. Good luck, I am sure the bond will happen and she will relax! __________________ Hillside Stable, Ardrossan, AB CHT Horse Stories!

01-23-2006, 01:11 PM
Gottahavehorses Weanling Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Northeast TN Posts: 315	First of all...give her lots of TLC & be patient with her. When you initially go in the barn, do you go in guns blazing, or do you walk in like you're sneakin' into church? Don't run into her stall, but try matter-of-factly going in with her. Talk to her in a calm voice. Start from her head & work your way down, petting her slowly & softly. It may take you days or even weeks to touch her all over, but she isn't going anywhere. If you find a spot that she likes you to touch, touch it alot! All the while, let your boyfriend help so she will understand not all men are going to hurt her. Then, once you can comfortably handle her all over & for longer periods, start introducing her to the scaries. Take it one day at a time and I promise, you'll get there with her. Good luck!

01-23-2006, 09:10 PM
Nogami47 Newborn Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Maine Posts: 24	Everybody has really good advice. Just remember that she's still very young and it would be natural for her to be a little spooky at this stage even without her trauma. Just give her lots of time and only work on one small step at a time, like you would do with a wild mustang. Spend as much time with her as you can, even if it's just sitting near her reading a book. Lots of quiet, calm time. If you know how to do T-Touch, you could try that.

01-23-2006, 09:41 PM
cole Halter broke Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: illinois Posts: 91	The only reason I am worried is that I bought a horse about a year ago. She was a yearling and had never been touched ever before. After I got her home she was easy to get to trust and aslo she wasn't scared of anything and is going to be a great horse. My mom made me sell her though . So I was just wondering if it was from the auction that my draft cross was like that or what.

01-23-2006, 09:56 PM
Nogami47 Newborn Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Maine Posts: 24	Well, I expect it is. It certainly sounds like she had a bad time. But I think you can be optimistic since she's so young. With good treatment and lots of patience, I would think there's a real good chance she'll get over it eventually.