Definitions for Horse Lovers

[PaintsQH]

Definitions for Horse Lovers
I can say several of these are true around my ole homestead. The water tank is the real deal


1-Hock: Financial condition of all horse owners.
2-Stall: What your rig does at rush hour in an unfamiliar city on the way
to a big horse show
3-A Bit: What you have left in your pocket after you've been to your
favorite tack shop.
4-Fence: Decorative structure built to provide your horse with something
to chew on.
5-Horse Auction: What you think of having after your horse bucks you off.
6-Pinto: Green coat pattern found on freshly washed light colored horses
left unattended for 2 minutes.
7-Well Mannered: Hasn't stepped on, bitten, or kicked anyone for a week.
8-Rasp: Abrasive metal tool used to remove excess skin from ones knuckles.
9-Lunging: Popular training method in which a horse exercises their owner
by spinning them in circles until dizzy.
10-Gallop: Customary gait a horse chooses when returning back to the barn.
11-Nicely Started: Lunges, but not enough health insurance to even think
about riding him.
12-Colic: Gastrointestinal result of eating at horse fair food stands.
13-Colt: What your mare gives you when you want a filly.
14-Easy to Load: Only takes 3 hours, 4 men, a 50lb bag of oats, and a
tractor with loader.
15-Easy to Catch: In a 10x10 stall.
16-Easy Rider: Rides good in a trailer; not to be confused with
'ride-able'.
17-Endurance Ride: End result when your horse spooks and runs away with
you.
18-Hives: What you get when receive the vet bill for your 6 horses, 3 dogs
4 cats, and 1 donkey.
19-Hobbles: Walking gait of a horse owner after their foot has been stepped
on by their horse.
20-Feed: Expensive substance used to manufacture manure.
21-Dog House: What you are in when you spend too much money on grooming
supplies and pretty halters.
22-Light Cribber: We can't afford to build anymore fencing or box stalls
for this buzz saw on four legs.
23-Three Gaited Horse: A horse that. 1) trips, 2)stumbles, 3) falls.
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THE 12 'MOST IMPORTANT' THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW IF YOU OWN A HORSE..
1-To induce labor in a mare? Take a nap.
2-To cure equine constipation? Load them in a clean trailer.
3-To cure equine insomnia? Take them in a halter class.
4-To get a horse to stay very calm and laid back? Enter them in a liberty
class.
5-To get a horse to wash their own feet? Clean the water trough and fill
it with fresh water.
6-To get a mare to come in heat? Take her to a show.
7-To get a mare in foal the first cover? Let the wrong stallion get out
of his stall.
8-To make sure that a mare has that beautiful, perfectly marked foal you
always wanted? Sell her before she foals.
9-To get a show horse to set up perfect and really stretch? Get him out
late at night or anytime no one is a round to see him.
10-To induce a cold snap in the weather? Clip a horse.
11-To make it rain? Mow a field of hay.
12-To make a small fortune in the horse business? Start with a large one.

[RenosGirl]

hahaha those are good, I haven't heard of those before!

[rm185western]

So True

[GreyDot]

Oh, so very, very true...

Especially the very last one

[HUnterJumper1]

so cute! I even shared it with my non-horsey family, and they laughed, too.

[ImzadiMoon]

Oh my goodness...those are AWESOME!! I tried really hard not to laugh out loud at work and give myself away

[kyspottedwalker]

Those are tooooo funny, but true

[99horses]

Those are so very true and funny. I love it.

[horseloverinVA]

[redboy]

Too Funny! I like all of those!! Redboy

[paso_lover]

Good one